Analysis of Everyday Life

Assignment 3: The Analysis of Everyday Life

Where exactly is power located in everyday life? Power is located in various places, within different people, groups and societies. It does not affect everyone equally nor does it affect everyone in the same ways; however, everyone in one way or another is affected directly or even indirectly. This notion of power has created the idea of the matrix of domination as well as marked and unmarked categories. At first, these two concepts were a bit confusing and hard to grasp. I wasn’t sure how to relate them to my life because I was not sure how to interpret them and incorporate the concepts into my own experiences. I began by breaking down the meaning of the matrix of domination and realizing that it is a way of examining and defining one’s own privileges and oppressions. This idea is more than just recognizing blessings and hardships but rather realizing how one person may be intertwined in both categories of being the oppressed and the oppressor. Many, including myself, tend to forget that “our privileges are the effects of systematic structures in which others are oppressed.” In order for one to be considered privileged, they must be compared to others who are less fortunate. In our society, we have formed both marked and unmarked categories which make an attempt at categorizing individuals based on specific characteristics. The unmarked categories tend to describe the generic or dominate groups, while the marked categories represent those considered to be subordinate and powerless. Throughout this paper I will analyze my own matrix of domination, acknowledging which marked and unmarked categories I fall within, while also comparing it to my partner Andria’s matrix of domination.

I was born into a Christian Orthodox family, both of my parents originating from the Middle-Eastern country of Palestine. I was born in Maryland and have lived the entirety of my life in Rockville, MD. I live with both of my parents, three older sisters and one younger brother. Though my parents are still together and I never moved from location to location like most of my friends, I had other issues to deal with. Unfortunately, my father never played a significant role in my life or the life of my siblings, in a loving aspect. I never quite understood how someone could be surrounded by such a loving, happy, laid-back family, yet be so miserable and negative. At a younger age, I had a hard time dealing with this but as I grew older and realized I couldn’t change anything, I began accepting the relationship or lack thereof with my father. However, my relationship with my mom was the exact opposite. She managed to raise five children and try her best to provide us with a stable and meaningful life. Though my relationship with my father was not strong, both he and my mom wanted my siblings and me to be better off than they were. My father came to America at the age of 16 and chose not to attend high school or college. My mother came at the age of 9, graduated from high school but was not allowed to attend college because according to her father, as a female she was not allowed to. Though neither of my parents attended college, they idea of doing well in school and succeeding in life was upheld to high standards in my household. My parents tried providing us with a stable household, however, finances were often a hardship and we were considered to be a lower- income family. In such a situation, I would be categorized as being the oppressed. Because I come from a low income family, with parents who did not attend college, I am expected by our society not to succeed. Due to the fact that others maybe better off and have educated parents, I have unwillingly and systematically been placed beneath others as the oppressed. However, I disagree with such ranking of power and chose to live my life differently than what was expected. At the young age of 13, I began working with a friend’s mother and by the age of 14, I was attending school and had a stable job working at a hair salon. I worked all throughout high school and though I had to give up playing basketball, I needed to make the money. I managed to maintain above average grades, while relieving the stress of my mother now that I was employed. At a young age I was paying for my own clothing, expenses when I went out, my cell phone, my vacations, and even my braces. Many of the things I had to pay for were things that my friends did not have to pay for and I often despised this. However, I soon realized that if I was helping my mother, it was all worth it and in the end I learned responsibility and independence. I soon began to appreciate that I was employed at such a young age, had my own money and though I matured much quicker than my peers, I look unto it as a positive experience. Though I worked all throughout high school, I managed to take honors and AP classes, graduating with a 3.85GPA and getting accepted to the University of Maryland, proving those assumptions to be false. Another aspect of my life that seemed to vary greatly from my peers was the fact that I was a Palestinian Christian and my parents wanted to make sure I did not lose any culture or religion. They raised my siblings and me in a rather strict household. I was not allowed to wear certain clothes, I was not allowed to have a boyfriend through my teenage years, could not stay out late, nor attend parties in high school, just to name a few. Growing up in my household, I thought was torture. I just wanted to be like all of my friends. Though I chose to allow religion to play a significant role in my life during my early teenage years, it was not until later in high school that I began to appreciate the morals and culture my parents instilled in me. The life I’ve lived is my normal; I am content with who I am and all that I’ve encountered. However, through examining my life I have realized that I am both a member of multiple dominant groups and a member of numerous subordinate groups. The following table will effectively sum up and display some of my own marked and unmarked categories, which will be the foundation for explaining my matrix of domination:

Marked(Subordinate)	Unmarked(Dominate)
Female	U.S. Citizen
Middle-Eastern(Palestinian)	Christian
Lower/Working Class	Young Adult
Arab Speaking	English Speaking
Employed with two jobs	Heterosexual

This table defines me as an individual, however, the categories and what falls within each has been determined by the society in which I live in. The unmarked categories are the more accepted and dominant traits, however, they only explain the surface of who I really am. Many of the traits that fall within my marked category truly define who I am as an individual and though they are deemed less powerful by others, some of these characteristics are what I am most proud of. I have encountered many experiences where a simple word that falls within one of these categories has worked against me and overpowered who I truly am, what I stand for, and how I contribute to the world I live within.

As I stated earlier, I am from a hard working family where finances have always been an issue. And when I got accepted to a great university, joy and accomplishment were at the forefront of my mind, while the thought of having to pay for college lingered right behind. I am simultaneously caught between being marked and unmarked in this situation. I will soon be a college student working towards receiving a degree in Communications. Yet I will have to deal with the struggle of having to take loans and pay for my own college tuition. I ultimately feel powerless and subordinate to those who do not have financial difficulties and whose parents will be paying for the entirety of their college tuition. It is unfortunate that the privileges of others being more well off has resulted in me being categorized as the oppressed in such a situation.

Another example in my life that defines my matrix of domination is the relationship of power between males and females. In my life, I have always had male friends and male cousins who have taken the responsibility of watching over me and acting as my protector. My male friends will make sure to walk with me at night and my male cousins have always shown power over me by being a bit over-protective, as to ensure that I do not get hurt. Though I would love to feel powerful and act as if I can stand my own ground all the times, there are certain situations, such as walking alone at night, where the presence of a more dominant male figure is appropriate. I have learned to appreciate this sense of domination for it is for my own good.

However, there are many instances that I have encountered where the domination of men over me is a bit unsettling and treated in a different aspect. Ever since I was a young girl, I loved to horse-play with the boys, challenge them to arm wrestling and most of all, play basketball with them. I have played basketball for over 10 years and though I will admit that some guys are better than me, I have always taken the risk to play pick-up basketball with them; however, the thought of a girls being able to play with guys is humorous to some. A prime example that I have recently encountered, which is similar to past instances I have dealt with, has taken place at the CRC here on campus. I will say that there is an equal ratio of men to female overall at the gym; however, one will notice that the weight room and basketball courts are predominately occupied by men. About 2-3 times a week, I choose to walk into the CRC and into the basketball court area. The court area is typically filled with about 40 or so guys, some playing on one of the two courts, while others waiting to play the next game. And every time I walk in, I receive the same reaction; all the guys waiting for the next game, stop, look over at me and then turn to their friends with a confused look- wondering if I’m there to watch, or actually plan on playing. I then proceed to say, “I’ve got next game.” While some of the guys agree and keep their thoughts to themselves, others ask “Are you sure you want to play?” And though not all the guys make comments, often times some will also say “don’t worry, I’ll take it easy on you.” At times, it is uncomfortable enough to be the only girl surrounded by over 40 guys but then they tend to make comments displaying their perceived dominance over me. Though I always manage to get playing time, this is a clear example of how falling into the marked category of being a female automatically makes me appear to be subordinate to the male gender.

After September 11, 2001, being an Arab/American in the United States only became harder, especially as a teenager. I grew up being proud of who I was, where I was from and the culture I had within me. I knew I was of a different background than others, but we were all human in my eyes, so it did not make much of a difference. I soon began being questioned about my background, often times dealing with various altercations and misconceptions by those who viewed me as being the oppressed compared to them. On numerous occasions, people assume that I am of Hispanic decent and I must explain that I am actually Middle Eastern. People are often confused and in disbelief, as if Middle-Eastern people are not supposed to look ‘normal’ or at least the way I do. Other times, people walk away while giving me dirty looks and comments because I am of Middle Eastern decent. Many people automatically assume that I must be a terrorist, know a terrorist, or even hate all Jewish people because I am from Palestine. The one misconception that seems to constantly resurface is that since I am Middle-Eastern, I must also be Muslim. I am often asked numerous questions that just prove people’s ignorance and lack of knowledge. Many times people will ask why my head is not covered and if my parents will be arranging my marriage. When I refer to God, some people will ask why I use that word if I am Middle-Eastern (meaning I must also be Muslim). People assume that I am not allowed to eat pork and other types of meat. And sadly, when I respond to these comments with a simple “I am actually Christian” people either simply do not understand how this is possible or assume that I must have converted to Christianity. Though many people just generally have a lack of knowledge on this topic, I also feel as if the media plays a large role in portraying Middle-Eastern people as a marked category. The media represents most Arabs as having heavy accents, men dressed with turbans and women fully clothed with their heads covered. Marriages are often arranged in movies, with the men dominating over the females. And worse of all, Middle-Eastern people are always the terrorists in movies and on the news. I have always been and will continue to be proud of my diversity, heritage and culture; however, such stereotypes cause other’s to often perceive me as someone I am not. Not to say that some Arabs do not have heavy accents, cover their heads or are actually terrorists, but this is not the case for all of us. But rather many automatically perceive all of us to be powerless compared to the unmarked white man in today’s society. This aspect of my life truly defines the matrix of domination in which I am located within. Though I am marked as a Palestinian, many tend to forget about the dominant categories in which I also fall within. I was born and raised in the United States and though I am Middle Eastern, I am also a US citizen. I am also privileged in the aspect that I am in the unmarked category of being a Christian. Although I am very proud to be a Christian Palestinian, it is unfortunate to know that those who may be Muslim Palestinians or of another religion in general are considered less powerful in everyday life.

Working with my partner, Andria, has proven to be beneficial in completing this assignment by helping me grasp a better idea of the meaning of matrix of domination. As I previously explained, I had a hard time understanding the matrix of domination at first and how it would pertain to my life. However, Andria and I worked together prior to beginning our papers and mapped out each of our marked and unmarked characteristics. Though we appear to be different on the outside, it interesting to stop and examine how similar two people can be in regards to marked and unmarked categories. We are both marked by society as being females of lower/working class. As a female, we are expected to be subordinate and less powerful than men and unfortunately we have both encountered experiences where we have been oppressed solely based on our gender.

Though we come from very different family sizes, we both face financial difficulties which has impacted our college experiences in ways that others more fortunate have not experienced. Andria is also from Baltimore, a city filled with violence; however, this does not define her as an individual, what she is worth or what she will amount to. Unfortunately, those above her, who may be from an area considered to a better living environment, feel the need to act as oppressors. They seem to ignore the positive aspects in her life and rather use her geographic location as means to portray her as subordinate to others. Likewise, I am expected not to succeed because I am marked as lower class with parents who did not attend college. I am the oppressed compared to those who are wealthier with educated parents. Unfortunately, those of lower class, with financial struggles in our society are automatically marked as subordinate to others who are of better economic status. This is just another example of the ongoing matrix of domination that exists in our everyday life. Nonetheless, Andria and I have both proven the assumptions about us to be wrong; we have both come from two different worlds yet met on common grounds as students in the same women’s studies class at the University of Maryland.

We are both marked as females, lower class, speaking another language, and employed causing us to equally be dominated by the male gender, those wealthier than use, and those who may only speak English. On the other hand, we are both unmarked as able-bodied, US citizens, heterosexual, young adults and also English speaking; our privileges also cause us to be the oppressors over others. We are both simultaneously the oppressor and the oppressed in the same aspects.

However, we both differ greatly when it comes to our ethnicity. Andria is unmarked, as she identifies herself as white/European. I, however, fall within the marked category as I am Palestinian/Middle-Eastern. It is a bit difficult to know that someone who I look to as my peer, my partner and friend, whom I relate to in so many aspects may also be considered more dominant and powerful over me. Andria has never once acted as if she was more privileged than me but rather we took the time to discuss our own matrix of domination and understand one another for the person we want others to perceive us as. It is unfortunate that our society is structured in a way that Andria’s own privileges have caused my classification as being oppressed.

This analysis of everyday life has allowed me to realize that power has two notions, emphasizing optimism and privilege on one hand, but also limits, strain and oppression. It is evident that everyone embodies both marked and unmarked characteristics simultaneously, this creating a matrix of domination. I have personally identified with my own marked and unmarked categories, accepting them and comparing my matrix of domination with my partner Andria. The matrix of domination has allowed me to understand others and have a broader perspective on the world around me.